Tony Deyo

Stand-up Comedian

Just like God intended...

Summers are a busy time for me. Meals have to be quick… but I don’t want to sacrifice nutrition. So, that’s why I picked up a package of Velveeta’s Rotini & Cheese with broccoli. Easy… like macaroni and cheese should be… and nutritious… like broccoli should be. I usually like my vegetables raw… like God intended… but I have to make a few sacrifices in the summer.

The broccoli came in an envelope.

And not even a big envelope… an envelope a little smaller than the one I get stamps in. If your vegetables show up in an envelope, don’t skip the workout that day. You’re going to need it.

I guess what upsets me the most is that the packaging makes it seem like you’re really going to get a pile of broccoli. Other than “Velveeta”, it’s the biggest font on there… even bigger than Rotini and Cheese. That’s misleading. It should be:

Rotini & Cheese
with a smidge of broccoli dust